soldiering on

To my friends, you who

listen to me,

who ask me how my day is going,

who hug me when I'm down,

who help me to laugh at life,

who tell me that I'm missed,

who watch movies with me and buy me dinner,

who attempt to distract me from the chaos of my current life with

flowers,

home cooked meals,

unexpected treats,

random visits involving board games,

getting me out of the house,

drinks on you,

ice cream,

and silly random text messages.

Who remain by my side

while I feel like I'm trapped and just wandering in a deep dark forest.

To you, I want to say thank you for believing in me

and affirming good things that you see and I don't.

You are a lifeline during hard times.

Today, I remembered that I am a fighter.

I remembered that I once upon a time was someone who

was able to take rage and malcontent

and channel surging negative energy

into forward motion and change.

I have decided that I'm not going to give up here

without one heck of a fight.

I am not defeated. Wounded and bloody, yes.

Somewhat battle-hardened, but not defeated.

Things are going to turn around.

I'll get by with a little help from my friends.